The Anti-Preview: Southern Cal. October 22, 2011

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It’s FUCK SOUTHERN CAL WEEK!!! Yeah- so welcome to the Anti-Preview on Subway Domer. -F-riends, Notre Dame looks like it is on a bit of a roll after winning its last 4 straight. The Irish are pretty healthy too, with the lone BIG exception being Ethan Johnson. We got new lids, playing at night, and have true confidence in themselves and what they can do against Southern Cal.

I hate to admit this (but not really); The Biscuit just killed this shit on Her Loyal Sons. If you haven’t read it already, take a moment. It OK, we be here. 

Alright then…

Burn Troy!

Southern Cal. There is no doubt that this is not the same type of team that Notre Dame was used to seeing in the Pete Carroll era. The house of cards that the USC legacy was built upon was already crashing down, even before Notre dame’s victory over Southern Cal last year.

Lane Kiffin is a complete fucking tool, and is an absolute disgrace to this series. Everything that comes out of his mouth is filled with “derp” and bullshit. The fact that USc is still “winning” with him at the helm, is more of a credit to Pete Carroll as opposed to anything Lane has done. (Like that is different from anything else in his life… “THANKS DAD, DERP!”

What the Trojans do have, is a fantastic quarterback in Matt Barkley. Barkley is shockingly overlooked by the national media, probably due to the sanctions. It’s not like he is getting slammed by them, but he is just never a name that they drop. They would say Kirk Cousins before Barkley. That is a joke. Barkley and his main target, Robert Woods are as good of a combo as there is in the country.

The bigger question mark is the Trojan defense. They are giving up 23.5 points per game, which is good enough to be ranked 46th in the country in that regard. However… if we take out the Arizona game, the average dips down to 15.8 points per game, which is pretty good.  

Straight up, this is a USC team that could have lost to Minnesota (they snuck by the Gophers 19-17. Their offensive line is not that good, and as good as Barkley is, he is like any QB as he crumbles under  defensive pressure. 

I HATE them, and this week has been a hard one to even get through because I am just bouncing off of the walls balls ass crazy son. BURN TROY!

What should you be drinking? Because of said craziness, you may feel like I do. Like a god damn crackhead. That makes this weeks beverage an easy one:

Subway Domer Crack 

• One part Apple Cider or Apple Juice
• One part Rum 

Mix together in a large water bottle, apple cider jug, cup, keg- whatever. Mix and drink yo! The type of rum is almost inconsequential. Captain Morgan is always a solid choice, but Bacardi does make a Big Apple rum that works quite well too. It just doesn’t matter. You’ll be getting wasted with ease. 

Now, lock yourself into a dark space and listen to the following music while drinking the SD Crack. Apple Zombies son! 

What should you be eating? We need to spice this thing up, and what better way is there to do that than to use Cholula Hot Sauce. Here are two recipes from those fine folks at Cholula that were kind enough to send me a 4 pack of awesomeness.

The 7 Wonders Burger

• Soft Sourdough Bun 
• Charbroiled Burger 1 Tbsp. Garlic Parmesan Butter (spread 1/2 Tbsp on each side of bun, then grill each side of bun until toasted) (WONDER #1) 
• 1/3 C. Onion Straws (WONDER #2) 
• 2 Slices Pepper-Jack Cheese (melted on burger) (WONDER #3) 
• 1/3 C. Sautéed Mushrooms (WONDER #4) 
• 3 Strips Crispy Applewood Bacon (WONDER #5) 
• 3 Slices Fresh Sliced Avocado (WONDER #6) 
• 1 Tbsp. Cholula Hot Sauce Mayonnaise (2 1/4 tsp mayo and 3/4 tsp. Cholula Hot Sauce) (WONDER #7)

The order of ingredients after the bun is grilled in the Parmesan Garlic Butter (from bottom up) is: onion straws, burger, cheese, mushrooms, bacon, avocado- then the hot sauce mayo is spread on the top bun.

Up the Middle Cholula Steak on a Stick

• 2 pounds skirt steak 
• 16 wooden skewers, soaked in water for 30 minutes 
• Marinade 
• 1/4 cup rice wine vinegar 
• 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar 
• 2 tablespoons sweet Chinese chili sauce 
• 1 teaspoon sesame seed oil 
• 2 tablespoons Cholula® Hot Sauce 
• 2 teaspoons lemon grass puree or 1/4 teaspoon dried lemon grass 
• 2 teaspoons grated ginger 
• 6 cloves minced garlic 
• 1/4 cup green onions – sliced thin 
• 1 tablespoon black sesame seeds 
• 1/4 teaspoon salt 
• 1/8 teaspoon black pepper

STEP 1: Trim the fat and membrane from both sides of the skirt steak.

STEP 2: With a sharp knife, slice the skirt steak against the grain into thin slices.

STEP 3: Feed the beef slices onto each skewer. Spread out the beef on the skewer to make as thin as possible. Place all 16 skewers into a large plastic container, making sure they can all lay flat.

STEP 4: In a bowl, combine the marinade ingredients. Pour marinade over skewers, lifting the skewers to make sure they all are covered with the marinade. Cover container and refrigerate a minimum of 3 hours (overnight is better).

STEP 5: Preheat grill to medium-high heat. Place the skewers on the grill and cook for 1 minute on each side. Remove from the grill and enjoy!

Irish Stew: NIGHT GAME Y’ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you didn’t know already, this will be the first night game at Notre Dame Stadium in over 20 years. I know that you know that I know that you know that… but somebody may have been flat-out wasted for the past 16 years. We can’t blame them.

Because of the rarity of the kickoff time, this game has been under the microscope. Not because of the opponent (Fuck Southern Cal), but because of what night games bring to the table. Lots of drinking, a bit more rowdiness, and COPS. Lots and lots of cops. I have no doubt that whatever newly found lax attitude the ushers inside the stadium may find for this game (big longshot there), that the ISEP and South Bend police will be drooling all over themselves to fill as many buses as possible to ship off to be booked.

Please, please be cautious. I will be with all of you in spirit, and in body. Be sure to wear your GREEN!!! Let’s do this shit!!!

What scares the shit out of me? NOT A MOTHERFUCKING THING!!!!! I’m not even going to pretend that I have no doubt about this victory. Fuck Troy! I don’t care about Robert Woods. I don’t care about Lane Kiffin and his over hyped ass (and over hyped daddy for that matter). Fuck them on their own horses with their swords. 

Can you tell I’m getting a little amped? Hmmmm….

Offensive MVP: Tommy Rees. Tommy took a bit of a beating during and after the USC game last year. His four turnovers were ugly, and the only reason that USC even stayed within reach to possibly beat the Irish last year. Still, after years and years of losses to the Trojans, Tommy was the man that got the job done (as ugly as it was). Saturday night should see a difference. If Rees can get through the first quarter without turning the ball over or making some really bad decisions, than I think there is a really good chance as a BIG night for Rees. Even with all of the playmakers that Notre Dame has on offense, they still need the point man to deliver. Tommy will do that, and then some. 

Defensive MVP: Gary Gray. Do I need to repeat that? GARY GRAY! I’m giving Gray the nod, not because he needs it, but I believe that we will see a surprise performance out of someone this Saturday night, and what better way than for Gary gray to have a monster game. What’s a monster game for a CB? Quiet. Oh, an INT or even an INT for TD would be nice and all; but for all of the shit Gray has took from fans and from the media about finding the ball in the air, Gray will do a great job on a big stage. COMPLETELY TURNING THIS THING AROUND. 

Something else to watch for on Saturday night: The biggest battle, as a whole to watch for, will be the Southern Cal offense against the Irish defense.  Can Notre Dame get pressure on Matt Barkley? I am confident in the ND defense to shut the running game down completely, or at least make it ineffective, but Barkley could still hurt us if he has time. If he IS pressured, as we have seen this season, his mechanics get a bit screwy and his accuracy is just about shot. Also, he may be somewhat of a pussy. Arizona State beat the shit out of him, and he looked like he wanted NOTHING to do with the game of football. BONUS!

Is there a Rivalry Trophy for this game? You bet your ass that there is. The Jeweled Shillelagh is in play, and if you have been reading Subway Domer this week, or following me on Twitter (@TheSubwayDomer), then you might have seen something like this:

At the end of the night… Notre Dame just has a bit more of everything. Southern Cal will be physically beaten up, and mentally raped by not just the team, but by the entire atmosphere. Last year stopped the streak, and this year not only starts another streak for the Irish, but gives HUGE notice that Brian Kelly is here to kick your ass. Who’s ass? All y’alls asses. IRISH WIN 38-24. Big night for Gray and Wood, but even bigger for the Notre Dame defense.  
 

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